Stray ‘Chinese’ Rocket Likely Spawned From Space Turtles Says Fauci, WHO, Johns Hopkins, NBC, Probably

First of all, rockets don’t have origins, you racist. Nothing does. Except evil. (And for what it’s worth, evil started in the United States by its so-called “founders.” This, too, is science. Look it up.)

Second of all, there’s a decent chance and I’m not saying definitely but definitely likely that the ROCKET-21 wasn’t manufactured in a lab but in fact created under the normal, natural and sometimes unfortunate circumstances of space.

Think about it. Think about the science. Think about what we’ve learned over the years with respect to rockets, space and life. We have decades of evidence to draw from on this subject. But for the slow-witted I’ll go ahead and spell it out, using science.

What are the odds of the Chinese Communist Party making a mistake at all, let alone one that might negatively impact the rest of the world?

It can’t be done.

It won’t be done.

It hasn’t been done.

And anyone who says otherwise is a racist and a science-denier.

Give it a few days and virtually all U.S. scientific and media communities will be telling you the same thing and backing it up with lots of studies and strongly-worded letters about Trump supporters, probably.

Author’s Note: On a more serious note, you should read this superbly smart and fair piece about COVID-19’s likely lab-oriented origin. Also, I don’t have to label this piece satire legally because I threw a few “probably”s in where they mattered most, and I don’t have to label it satire morally because the scientific and media communities mentioned have a now-solid track record of propagandizing that hard on behalf of the Chinese Communist Party.

Make sure to check out WhatFinger News for all the best right-minded media content from around the web.


  1. It’d be even funnier if it weren’t for the fact that none of the “experts” in the military and space organizations can tell us where it will “land”. I keep thinking how sad it would be if DC were in it’s “flight path”


    • Agreed. I’ve been saying for a while “Who knows what they’ll come up with to meddle in 2022.” I’m not gonna lie, the thought of this being the mechanism for that has crossed my mind. More than once. In fact many times, since I first heard about it. Not sure what to do with that thought. Guess I’ll just leave it here in a comment for now and hope that’s where it stays because it will never matter. Hopefully.


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