Hey Mike DeWine: Pretty Sure We Have Enough Hospital Beds & Ventilators To Open Back Up, No?

Why are you continuing to do this, Mike? It started out as an effort to ensure hospitals weren’t overrun, and there were enough ventilators to go around.

The goal was never to prevent every person in America from getting a virus that 99% of them would survive and a large chunk wouldn’t even know they got. That was never the goal because it would’ve been stupid and reckless on its face.

But go figure, more than a year later and somehow that’s exactly where we are now. It’s almost as if, stay with me here…but it’s almost as if this is what people who don’t like America very much but love power wanted the entire time.

And you’re going right along with it still.

But here’s the really insane part: you’re keeping the charade up despite vaccines now being available to literally every adult who wants one.

I’m sorry but what in the actual FUCK!?

The vulnerable population is 100% well-tended to and provided for.


There’s no threat of hospital bed or ventilator shortages.


What on God’s green earth are you still doing this to us for, you asshole?!

Mike your career is over if we have to do it ourselves until you grudgingly go along.

I repeat: there’s a vaccine now available to anyone who wants it.

What are you still doing?!

It’s not funny. It’s not cool. It’s not safe and at this point it has nothing to do with public health.

All this started to slow the spread because we were worried about beds and ventilators. That concern is gone, you monster. It’s not your job to protect people who don’t want the vaccine, or newly-minted hypochondriacs (thanks to you, Mike!) who take it but still believe in their paranoid little minds that it meant nothing and they’re still unsafe.

You’re not allowed to punish literally everyone else in the state to protect a tiny population of assholes and idiots, Mike. And if you think you are, then don’t be surprised that we count you among that tiny population of assholes and idiots, Mike.

They’re called “liberals” and Ohio Republicans wouldn’t have selected or elected you if we knew you were one of them.

Mike, you’ve created exponentially more problems in every aspect of Ohioans’ lives, including our health, than you’ve mitigated.

Now it’s time to kick the assholes and idiots out of the room, own that you screwed up and can’t undo it, then do something about ending the pain so at least there’s less of it starting right now.

Get out of the way and do your job or we’ll fire you for someone who will in 2022 and neuter you in the meantime.

And Mike, there won’t be anywhere for you to land. Your humiliation and failure will follow you everywhere. America First is roaring back in 2022 and everyone in your orbit, from the strategists on both sides of the aisle to the media on the only side they exist, knows it. As bad as it seems for our side right now it will be exponentially worse for theirs once we send an army of duly-elected America First patriots to the House and Senate in 2022.

So you can be on the badly losing side of that inevitable proposition, or you can do what you were elected to and stand up for the people of this state.

You can still be counted among the heroes, however pathetically late your arrival was.

You’ve been played the entire time. You started off as Amy Acton’s bitch and now you’re the laughingstock of the entire institutional left, not to mention the conservative right.

Your scared, pathetic, arbitrarily-defined slow walk now to re-open things is only sealing your fate as a failed American governor who was too afraid, lazy or stupid to do the right thing for his state.

There’s a vaccine now for anyone who wants it. The vaccines are effective. Everything else at this point is worse than theater. It’s purposeful destruction of our lives, businesses, families, schools and literally every child in America as not a single one of them has gone a day without suffering under this more so than the adults, including in ways we can’t yet fully quantify or understand in terms of the damage to them socially, psychologically, and physiologically with respect to breathing recycled carbon dioxide for hours on end and the effect that will have on their still delicately-developing immune systems. Not to mention all the division foist on us with your stupid and pointless orders.

It’s all political now. It’s all a big fight. And you’re still sitting there not only letting it happen, but siding with the institutional leftists who caused all this damage and made you the face of it in Ohio.

Come up with whatever excuse you need to cover your humiliation. Package it in “How great everyone did!” or some cheesy lie like that. All your lockdowns and mask mandates did was destroy people and lives and divide us. But if you have to lie and say all of that worked so well that now we can open back up, sure, go ahead.

It beats the ever-loving heck out of the lie you’re currently telling, wherein amid no shortage of hospital beds or ventilators and with effective vaccines available to anyone who wants one and with a large chunk of the population already being inoculated because they got the virus and didn’t even know it and all that on the backdrop of a virus with a 99% survival rate — a year into this thing with all that’s happened, and you’re still lying to us and telling us we have to stay locked down and masked-up to prevent…

…to prevent what, Mike?

To protect who, Mike?

Someone who chooses not to get the vaccine, Mike?

Someone who’s too stupid to trust or political to admit that it works, Mike?

That’s why we all need to suffer and pay and watch our children suffer and pay, Mike?

For that tiny population of assholes and idiots, Mike?!

You’re evil at this point. That’s how you’re seen. Do something about it or you won’t have a job in 2022 and the only reputation you’ll have is one of being a sniveling little America-hating gutterslut who refused to stand up and do what science, common sense and morality dictated.

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One comment

  1. Point of order there, slick. I was in agreement with you, until that last section… with one breath tout that the kung flu is 99 percent survivable, then calling people who don’t trust the experimental RNA therapy cocktail “stupid?” I’ve had covid, despite having to put up with bullshit masks for work. It sucked, but my immune system kicked its ass in the end. And you know what? I’d STILL trust my immune system for this 99 percent survivable virus over an experimental gene therapy any time. Especially given the track record of big pharma in the past few years. Why the hell would you pull a liberal douchebag move, and call people who are reticent about the jab (who just want to get back to work and allow their immune system to function) “idiots and assholes?”
    P.S. And turtle man DeWine can just go give himself an enema with a backward cactus. (2 weeks to flatten the curve… More like 20 months to flatten the state.)


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